Why should you be assertive?

Most people, when faced with a difficult situation, are left struggling at crossroads. They are either unable to react or express their truthful opinion, or are afraid to break down the wall between them and the other party. This behaviour further enhances fear, pressure and a dip in self-confidence.

Having said that, it is important that one possesses the right skills to declare or affirm a statement that proves his or her point of view without violating the rights of others. The ability to communicate decisively and honestly not only improves relationships between family, friends and co-workers; it also helps you to gain better control of your own life.

10 simple steps to achieving assertiveness

The first step to being assertive is to master the use of body language to reflect confidence. Stand up straight and maintain eye contact with the person you are communicating with. Speak in a firm but pleasant tone. Familiarise yourself with the facts and details of the situation while maintaining a habit to listen. Then, ask questions during the discussion to see if you can find a compromise to meet the needs of both parties. Prepare yourself for unfavourable responses, and remember to never give in to pre-conceived notions that the other parties' motives are negative.

Adopt the practice of surrounding yourself with inspirational influences to reinforce your faith in proper values. Have confidence that your own abilities and style will ultimately work if you let them. And remember, practice makes perfect!

Benefits of adopting assertive skills

Practicing assertiveness will enable you to enjoy a more balanced, stress-free lifestyle and gain better control of your daily activities. Other benefits include:

• Ability to manage colleagues and friends effectively and empathetically.
• An increase in work effectiveness and productivity.
• Developing an assertive body language, vocal language and image.
• Developing the skills to give feedback, critique and praise where valid.
• Ability to understand and assert your rights.
• Developing a proactive behaviour to manage aggressive and passive behaviours in others.

Assertive communication helps strengthen your relationships with family, friends and co-workers. A polite but assertive "no" to excessive requests from others will enable you to avoid overloading your schedule and at the same time, promote a balanced and healthy lifestyle.